A letter from one of our readers:
"How about when your a complete gentleman. You intently listen to what your date says, open doors for her, pay or if I'm not allowed to ask if next I can, always on time, never rude, make her laugh whenever possible, never crowd her, and I have no expectations except to enjoy their company. Now the question is- one, where is one good woman. I give every girl equal consideration. I am good looking, 6'4" 197lbs. 24 yrs old male, have a great attitude, intelligent, giving, considerate, I've been called "the last knight in shining armor". I admit I'm a little shy but that is not the cause.
To tell the truth I've really had it with dating. Dating has gone from something that you would become really excited about two weeks before the actual date to balancing a checkbook. I can't be alone in with this problem, can I?
If there is any advice you could sent me I would greatly appreciate it."
Here is the reality of the situation. Most women like the "chase" they are given. A man becomes exciting to women for a variety of reasons. It may be their looks that push women over the edge, the man could create some level of mystery which creates curiosity in women or the man might just have that knack that creates a mode of needing to chase the man because he is exciting to the women. The excitement, adventure and even danger creates this chase for the women.
In most women’s eyes, a man as you describe is somewhat boring. Whether women admit it or not, they like the unexpected, the uncertainty of the moment which creates excitement, adventure and potentially even danger. You need to get a women’s heart pumping and you will slide yourself right into her love. Remember, a knight in shining armor is not what you describe. People refer to the knight in shining armor because they are mysterious, adventurous, brave, daring and most likely handsome. They will in a moment risk their life to conquer great fights over barren terrain all in the honor of saving their bride from the burning castle tower. That’s exciting and enough to get any women’s heart racing. What you describe is safe and usual or in other words, the average Joe and most women tend to like having average Joe's as friends and not lovers. You can’t just be an average Joe.
So let’s get back to reality, how does this relate to you? Confidence! Don’t be shy in anything you do or your mate will not view you as their knight. You may think that you are not shy, but the fact that you mention it tells me it exists. You must posses a high level of confidence and you must rid yourself from being shy in anything that you do. Always have your own opinion and be strong in your convictions. With confidence in everything you do, you will automatically create the mystery around you and will work toward winning the feelings of your mate. Opening a car door is nice, but getting on an airplane and jumping out while you hold hands with your mate is exciting. I am not saying you need to jump from an airplane, but everyone has their things in life that get their heart pumping. Be adventurous, be unexpected, be creative, be spontaneous and most of all be confident.
Drew is the creator of FriendPad.com, the free online dating site.
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